I've got a few more questions for God. . . .

I have been quoted (many times) saying that I had all sorts of questions for God when I got to heaven. (Yes, we are making that assumption) Those questions range from:

"Lord, why did you create mosquitoes, really?"

to

"Seriously God, why cancer?"

Tonight, being mid-November, I'm not asking about mosquitoes. Those questions usually surface in mid-July.

Tonight, I'm asking God (yet again) about cancer.
I'm asking Him why it strikes so often.
I'm asking Him why it's striking someone I love. . . again.

I'm not going to assume anything about His answers. All I'm going to assume is that His will is perfect, and that His ways are higher than my ways.

If you've read the blog at all recently, you know that we were awaiting news on the pathology for my friend, Beth. Although I believed, and firmly held to the belief that the mass in her throat would be just that. . .a mass. I just found out that it is cancer -- two types of cancer, actually. And, the two words I dreaded the most: advanced stage were part of the diagnosis.

It's nearly 1 a.m., so I haven't called up to Canada to talk to Beth. I know, at some point, she'll be reading this. (And you know I love you more than my words can express) But, had I called -- I would've had no words. I'm amazed that words are coming out right now -- except for the fact that I don't actually have to talk. Typing is easier, because the words aren't getting caught in my throat.

I don't know when they learned the news--I just read the email within the last 15 minutes. I was at a worship team rehearsal tonight. It is comforting to reflect on the songs we rehearsed tonight. But it's funny....I remember having a thought, during rehearsal:

"If Beth gets news that isn't good news, these songs are going to be hard to sing on Sunday."

And, I was right -- they will be hard to sing. But, not because they're not true. It's because they suddenly mean so much more to me than they've ever meant:

Blessed be Your name, on the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering, Blessed be Your Name
You give and take away, my heart will choose to say:
"Lord, blessed be Your name!"

and

No guilt in life; no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
'Til He returns, or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand

not to mention

On Christ the Solid Rock, I stand
All other ground is sinking sand

and then there's

You took my sin and my shame
You took my sickness and healed all my pain
Thank you, Lord. Thank you, Lord

If pressed, I would said that I really do have questions for God. But, it would be offensive, wrong, and weak of me to ask them. What do I do instead?

I bow at His feet. . . accepting that His will is perfect. I acknowledge that He knows and sees more than I will ever know or see. I worship Him for being holy, righteous, perfect, and GOOD. I praise Him for loving us more than we can describe. I thank Him for Jesus. . . and I marvel in the joy of my (and Beth's) salvation.

Beyond that. . .I (we) have got His word. And, while here on earth, that's gonna have to be enough.

Isaiah 55:9
"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."

Habakkuk 3:17-19

"Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign LORD is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights."

Isaiah 41:10

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Isaiah 40:28-30

"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

Ephesians 3:20-21

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen."

Not that I'm questioning God's will or anything . . . but I am asking Him to amaze the heck out of a few doctors. I believe (with Paul) that God has the ability to do anything--even the stuff we can't imagine Him doing. I am asking Him to heal Beth without the need for radiation, chemotherapy, or more invasive surgeries. Because my God can do immeasurably more than I ask or imagine.

And. . .I'd be honored if you'd join me in that prayer.